Post-Adoption-Visit-Blues with a Side of Profundity


Deborah's visit to Seattle has come and gone. There were high high's and low low's. It remains to be a surreal experience for both of us to be able to spend time together. I am now left to recover from the post-adoption-visit blues, I imagine that she, too, is navigating her own feeling of loss, separation and sadness. Deborah uttered many profundities during her stay. However, one remark in particular has left me with a lot to ponder. She said:

...they cared a lot about you right away. But no one cared about me. Hours after you were born, I was back out on the streets. Homeless. But you were getting medical care, people were choosing your name, and searching for a good home for you...
— Deborah (birthmother)

The term "abandonment" is often thrown around with regards to a child when a parent is unable to care for them, but it seems we could just as easily apply the word to birth-parents who receive no support after relinquishing their child. I spoke with a colleague about this statement, to which we both wondered what advances the social-work profession has made specifically regarding treatment of birth-parents. Where can we learn about best-practices?